One Size Fits Most

Wednesday, August 31, 2005


Seems OC has found the blog...WELCOME!
Now I'm up to 3 readers!

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Whats your SuperPower?

The SuperPower Family:

Not much happening here

But if you need me for something, I'm the one with my nose pressed to the TV
which is tuned to the Weather Channel.
Prayers for everyone in the Gulf Coast, especially New Orleans.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Found: Lost Breasts

Bra with side air bags does a good job of holding them where they are
supposed to be, as opposed to in the armpits!

Here's the Latest

Since my one and only blog reader (hi Big Daddy!!) has complained of the
lack of new posts lately, here's an update:
I had an unfortunate incident this morning with a tomato, chef knife, and
thumb. Kind of like rock, paper, scissors. Long story short, the knife
beats thumb. Big Daddy takes me to get it stitched up. Took a LOOOONG
time! Big daddy had to leave the room. Big Daddy's lips were white as his
skin. Thumb now wrapped in pretty white gauze. Lucky me blood doesnt show
up in tomato.

OC doing pretty well. 6 more radiation treatments and 3 more chemo
treatments now that Mr Low White Count is out of isolation. He may even
come to church tomorrow, as long as he brings the antibacterial hand gel.

Scored one new 14 year old babysitter who lives, get this, NEXT DOOR! Woo
Hoo! Hopefully we will be able to abuse, er I mean use her at least until
she turns 16 and gets a life.

DQ and GB having a swell time at school this year. So far no illnesses or
complaints (GB had mono the first day of 2nd grade). GB gets his appliance
put in on Sept 6th. The orthodontist said the best thing is when he is bad,
I get to crank it twice!!

And last but not least, I'm still married to the best guy a girl like me
could ask for. Thats you, Big Daddy, my one and only blog reader!!

Monday, August 08, 2005


Ladies BEWARE....................

This is a heads-up to those friends who haven't experienced it yet and an
explanation to those friends and family who have.
Most of you have read the scare-mail about the person whose kidneys were
stolen while he was passed out. Well, the kidney story was a hoax but this
one is real.
It's happening every day. My thighs were stolen from me during the night a
few years ago. It was just that quick. I went to sleep in my body and woke
up with someone else's thighs that have the texture of cooked oatmeal. Who
would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been mine for years?
Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine. I spent the entire
summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself
to living out my life in jeans and Sheer Energy pantyhose.
Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My butt was
next. I knew it was the same gang because they took pains to match my new
rear end to the thighs they stuck me
with earlier. However, they attached it badly -- at least three inches lower
than my original. Now, my rear complemented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic,
I prayed that long skirts would stay in fashion.
It was two years ago when I realized my arms had been switched. One morning
I was fixing my hair and I watched horrified but fascinated as the flesh of
my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was
really getting scary. My body was being replaced one section at a
How clever and fiendish. Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age is supposed
to creep
up, unnoticed, something like maturity. NO, I was being attacked repeatedly
and without warning. In despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could they do
to me next?

My poor neck disappeared more quickly than the Thanksgiving turkey it now
resembled. That's why I decided to tell my story. I can't take on the
medical profession by myself. Women of the world, wake up and smell the
coffee. I now realize where those surgeons are getting their replacement
parts. They really aren't plastic like they claim. The next time you
suspect someone has had a face 'lifted,' look again.
Was it lifted from you??

I think I finally found my thighs and I hope that Cindy
Crawford paid a really good price for them!

This is not a hoax. This is happening to women in every town
every night.

P.S. I must say that last year I thought someone had stolen my breasts. I
was lying in bed and they were gone! As I jumped out of bed I was relieved
to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep
them hidden in my waistband.

Good news and bad news

Ok which do you want first???
Ok the "good" news....I got a tattoo on my left ankle. Its a "rebellious
but safe" butterfly. I wanted a trinity knot but they didnt have any
examples of that and I didnt want anyone tattooing willy nilly on my skin
without a picture to go by. But butterfly was my 2nd choice because the
Bible says we are a new creation and that is how butterflies are when they
come out of their cocoons. Plus they didnt have any pink flamingoes.

The "bad" news...BD is diabetic. Which will probably be a good thing in the
long run, because we will all eat healthier and benefit. We can just scrape
all the carbs off our plates onto DQ's plate so she can get some calories.
All of herself 53 pounds fully clothed dripping wet. Hmmmph.

And the kids started school today. Gee, its quiet here.

Goodnight, Peter

Peter Jennings has died of cancer. That makes me sad for 2 reasons....#1
I'm a news junkie. He's such an icon.....#2 My dad.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

No chemo for you today, Mr Low White Count!!

He was just dancin a jig when they told him he couldnt have his treatment
today. Its not like he got off on good behavior or anything.
He does appear to be feeling well, but what we dont need is for him to get
septic and end up in the hospital with some funky infection.

Summer is almost over. The kids start school on Monday. In lieu of
uniforms the school system has decided to tighten up the school dress code.
I can see this being a great big thorn in my side. Some of the rules are
concrete, such as you have to wear a belt if your pants have belt loops.
You must tuck in your shirt. However, the length of shorts is open to
interpretation, as is "no shower shoes." So do Crocs count as shower shoes?
What about Birkenstocks?? Ok if we are going to have some rules, make them
concrete and all interpret them the same.

The mini-honeymoon is now over, as I have more Mt Laundry to climb.